Before its too late

I admire strong people , loyal and kept the relationship holding strong than ever .  Some people don’t get married to the same person they dated or engaged with . My relationship may not be longer than some girls out there but I am damn amazed for those who eventually enters the marriage journey together . You know like 10 years of dating and the big day comes , i am so so so happy for these kind of people .  Having this 3 year plus relationship is already taking a toll on me , what alone is 10 years .

A is my better half , he reads me like a book . And I probably know all his strength and weakness at the back of my hand . If it was not because of A , maybe this blog wouldn’t exist . The one very thing that A taught me is that NEVER TO LET GO , no matter how bad the fight or situation is . To date , A is the most loyal person I ever know . He even knows if I show signs of straying away from the relationship . Maybe his past experience makes him seem like a freak now . heh . Indeed , he is controlling and quite the jealousy type but he was never demanding or possessive except that sometimes or most of the times he is not the automatic type and his words always comes out at the wrong timing. He is not good at consoling me , he sucks at buying my birthday presents and sometimes he can be a asshole at certain point of my life .

The gifts and presents that he lavish on me can be counted by fingers . What he doesn’t know is that he is challenging me . Way beyond my own expectation . I am used to being too independent that sometimes I love to go out shopping or having outside eating alone . Which is good . I’m a Gemini and I change my feelings and expectations a lot of times . And I hate clingy people . Why do you even have to report to your fiance/boyfriend if you just took the bus or mrt .. (mayb just me ,no offence lah hor )  If I fight with him , I would rather shut myself out and not even bother to look for him . During the early years of us being together , everytime we fight it would end up with both of us crying our eyes out , I will cry than he will cry .. And whenever I ask for the break up . He will refuse and die die want to mend things between us . But usually he will not change or i simply don’t bother to open my mouth anymore . But he still know I’m angry cause now 3 years plus of experience under our belt , we communicate with body language and face expression . All im saying is that , i am thankful that A have that NEVER LET GO mindset no matter how tough it was, because look at us . 207 days to be wedd . I can’t predict the future but I hope Allah grants all our wishes and make our journey and preps smooth .

I understand that feelings fade and human change but I ‘m not gonna say how up till now A is so loyal to me . But he is , Top Notch .  You know when you fight, all you think is how you can get someone even more better than your partner now . Or you question yourself , do you really deserve this kind of partner .  Most of the time I did . When whenever I am alone or mostly when A is driving beside me . I know that though he can be a bitch , but he is a good one .  With him I can be whatever I want , act like whoever I want and all those nonsense .  Thus , this song is like a reminder to me .  With all these wedding preps taking a toll on me . I don’t want us to succumb to pressure and all .

If I think that I could get someone better than A , so could he . I’ve seen people who broke up only to date someone else and when that fails , they always think that the ex was so much better . All i ever want now , like now is to tell A on the dias in 208 days that WE MADE IT  .


So yes A , I will remind my guy friends to text me less often or block whoever you think may have unnecessary intention towards me . OK you win . heh

A -1 \ F-0

I bet you start loving me

As soon as I start loving someone else
Somebody better than you
I bet you start needing me
As soon as you see me with someone else
Somebody other than you
And I know that it hurts
You know that it hurts your pride
But you thought the grass was greener on the
Other side

Anyway , EID MUBARAK my lovely readers . Will update bout my raya antics soon . xx


One thought on “Before its too late

  1. azharwaty1604 says:

    Yes darling.. you will get to tt 10th yr or 1000000th yr or infinity yrs.. slowly but surely.. nevertheless nothing comes easy.. “kesabaran, kesetiaan, kejujuran” tt 3 are the most important for r/s to work.. (tts for me la hor, it works dari dulu sampai now da 10 yrs, but for others might not be the same).. have faith my dear.. and everything else will fall into place.. insya’allah..

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